Letter of the Week, Presented by Rip Curl

posted by / Letter of the week / November 8, 2010

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LOTW runs for seven days, with the week’s most brilliant submissions picked and posted every Monday on surfingmagazine.com. There are two ways to write in: send an email to surfing@sorc.com, or use the Write a Letter tab on our Facebook page.

 

We adore surfing, but is its love too rough? Does it treat us mean to keep us keen? Does it treat us like dirt so we’ll stick to it like mud?

Letter of the Week: Surfing Ruined My Life

“Surfing Ruined My Life.” That bumper sticker stopped in front of me at a red light. I think it meant surfing the activity, not the magazine, because you don’t ruin lives. You ruin study habits.

But surfing does ruin lives. My friend and I had a conversation about this the other day. If surfing were a girlfriend, it would be the worst nightmare succubus wench outside Fashion Island — the type born platinum blond straight onto a Stairmaster, hot and shallow as a frying pan. She’d wear faux-felt Juicy tracksuits and walk her tiny rodent canine to Starbucks at 10:00 a.m. on weekdays, when decent people are working.

She would sap our ambition and convince us to settle for flexible jobs, draw down our bank balance in outsize rent checks so we could live steps from the beach, shut us off from friends and family who’d quietly wish her next facelift would turn fatal, that needy, scheming, gold-digging bitch.

What are we giving up right now to be with surfing? It’s best not to think about it.

Love,
Brad Lynch
Venice, CA

 

Damn it Brad, quiet yourself! She’ll hear you…

—Ed

 

Despite the chauvinistic overtones, Brad, we think we see your point. But whatever surfing takes away in the form of wealth or achievement or social status or meaningful relationships — trivial things — it gives back tenfold in the form of…you know, surfing. And try as you might, you’ll never leave it. Rip Curl knows this, and they want the buttery new E-Bomb below to keep your surfing relationship running smoothly.

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Next week’s LOTW winner will come to know the meaning of bounty and happiness.

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4 Responses to “Letter of the Week, Presented by Rip Curl”

  1. jimmy slade says:

    best one so far

  2. michael says:

    hahahahaha nice!

  3. Alex K. says:

    Fuck small dogs.

  4. Allen Layne says:

    I thought my letter was sick this week but, ok yeah, I retreat. This wins. Waving a white flag. Surfing is probably cheating on us too, that lousy little tart.

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