You Can’t Marry Carissa Moore

Carissa Moore has never done worse than a Semifinal finish in 2016. She also hasn’t done better. #themoreyouknowCarissa Moore. Photo: Jimmicane

Carissa Moore might not win any more World Titles. Carissa Untermann probably will, though.

The 3x World Champion recently got engaged to her longterm boyfriend, Mr. Luke Untermann. Luke’s a real stud — he once competed in American Ninja Warrior — and the two will presumably live happily ever after. They may even have superhuman babies one day.

We just wanted to tip our caps and give a quick congrats to Riss and Luke. Oh, and put out a PSA letting you know that if you were planning on marrying Carissa Moore, you can’t. Sorry.