Lunada Bay Boys Just Got Pulled Over

Palos Verdes police chief declares war, almost

Imagine no possessions…

John Lennon couldn’t. And you probably can’t.

Ownership can be a complicated concept. It’s simple when the acquisition of property is fair and indisputable — you pay for a hat, it becomes your hat — but things get messy when it is unclear if something — like open space — could or should be owned. Ever since the dawn of time and/or egos, that problem has caused civilizations to engage in wars of blood. And in more recent times, it has caused adult men to behave like this:

That’s hidden camera footage captured at Lunada Bay, Southern California’s friendliest wave…well, so long as your definition of friendly evokes imagery of grown and sometimes balding men damaging cars, throwing rocks and making physical threats to strangers. Aloha!

You see, a group of folks who go by the Lunada Bay Men Boys believe themselves to be the owners of the wave. It is theirs because they worked so tremendously hard at being born there. And as keepers of the mushy righthander, they figure it’s only dutiful to terrorize outsiders into staying away. Their protection of Lunada Bay has spawned countless acts of violence and vandalism, placing the crew in very high regards with the general public. They have been called entitled thugs, trust fund bullies and flat out assholes. Soon, they might be called criminals.

As per this article on the LA Times, the Palos Verdes Police Department has decided to crack down on the Lunada Bay Boys. They’re investing extra resources into patrolling the coast, and Police Chief Jeff Kepley is quoted saying, “We will make an example out of anyone who behaves criminally down there.”

So, could this be the end for surfing’s most affluent hard asses?

We’ll see. The article, which is threaded with the narrative of a man who has experienced the dark side of Lunada firsthand, seems to view Kepley’s vow through a skeptic lens. Only time will tell.

PS – I kind of respect the Lunada Bay Boys in a weird way. Are their methods brash and childish? Absolutely. Are they entitled pricks? I’m sure! But do they achieve their goal? Very much so.

Part of me wants to believe that they are well aware of how cavemanish their shtick is, but are also aware of how effective if is, and so they carry on in a guilty, blissful daze. Most people — myself included — want nothing to do with that place. Why surf an average wave and get harassed when you could just go surf a normal wave with normal people and enjoy yourself? Mission accomplished, fuckwads.

PPS – Just gonna leave this here.