Out of Office Reply: How to Lose Heats and Sell Boardshorts

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Out of Office Reply is Editor Taylor Paul’s column on big waves, travel, and other manly bits.


dillon perillo

Dillon Perillo and Ocean Beach, great friends.


Out of Office Reply
It’s a hazy drive to the beach and the low morning sun casts long shadows on the homes and businesses along Geary Street. I’m still fuzzy from Saturday night’s Halloween festivities and anxious to jump in the crisp Pacific to wash off this hangover and face paint.

Arriving at the north end of Ocean Beach, I drive past a pack of the Kelly’s Cove Local Boys and they check out my girlfriend in the passenger seat because she’s gorgeous and despite popular opinion, there are straights in San Francisco. I park. The water is glassy and the sun is out but there’s not much swell in the water, meaning it’s overhead and wedgey.

The Rip Curl contest scaffolding stands a half mile south of where I’m parked, and I wonder why they set up shop where the waves are disorganized and the current’s strong. But it’s a logical decision, actually: Better parking + a big restaurant = eyes = boardshort sales. “It’s all about the boardshorts,” says Dillon Perillo when he joins me in the parking lot. “People claim t-shirts and wetsuits, but really it’s all about the boardshorts.”

Dillon’s a funny dude.

We surf and he surfs well and does some air spins and big turns. He let’s me borrow a leash which saves me many swims to the beach. For some reason he knows a lot of local guys in the water and shakes their hands. He says that on Friday he went to a rave with young Maverick’s charger Colin Dwyer. “But there weren’t any glow sticks or anything.”

We speak about contest surfing and he acknowledges how much you have to sacrifice to win. “You pretty much can’t have friends. You just talk to your team managers and your coaches and don’t do anything fun.”

Which is something to keep in mind when picking your roster for your Fantasy Action Sports League. He’ll be surfing against Rip Curl teammate Owen Wright in the first round. Owen’s made three finals this year. Owen’s got a coach. Owen was absent from last Friday’s rave. And he’s certainly not going to the 49ers game right now with Australia Surfing Life editor Chris Binns.

Dillon is.

“I don’t know, I should probably be focusing or whatever. But what am I supposed to do? Go sit in my room by myself and stratagize?”

We’ll see ya in Round 2, Dillon!